This is ultimately a big part of it, and it’s universal, not just in dating. Most friendships are “friendships of convenience” and the other types of relationships typically progress from there. But in western culture, we don’t have any third places, and so we just plain don’t make friendships of convenience anymore.

I’ve found several long term relationships off tinder as a WLW. It seems to work pretty well for me. The system doesn’t seem to be working for guys, and that’s unfortunate. But a lot of the pressure on women to settle for any man has gone away as women have become more self reliant. The whole thing has become far more consensual and less mandatory for survival. That’s going to influence men’s dating success no matter what medium people use to find matches.

I work on software that you’re probably using right now, and my company is like 60% women. It’s wonderful. We spend a lot of our (very few) meetings talking about our feelings, discussing hair and skincare, and gossiping about each other’s love lives. The inter-team drama sometimes gets pretty funny though. We’ve been in a passive-aggressive fued with another team since some time last year.

It’s also extremely gay. Everyone always says they love working with me, but all i do is go around flirting with my work crushes and having fun.